Friday, 10 October 2014

Self Harm Distractions * Trigger Warning*


This isn't going to be a usual happy blog post but it's important . I've known too many people who self harm for too many different reasons that should never lead them to feeling like it is the only option . I am not a qualified professional and If you are effected by self harm I definitely urge you to go and find professional help to stop,  which I talk a little about at the end of my '100 reasons to live' post which you can find by clicking here . Today I'm not talking about stopping self harm because I believe the main key to that is talking about but today I want to talk about distractions to get you through the night because if you stop yourself every night then eventually that can lead to stopping completely . 

What is Self Harm ?

Self harm ... Demi Lovato really inspires me and she helps me when I feel upset , her music is so relatable .
  1. 1.
    deliberate injury to oneself, typically as a manifestation of a psychological or psychiatric disorder.
  1. 1.
    commit self-harm.

Self harm is very serious and can take place in many different forms that deliberately cause physical damage to yourself,  including : 

• Cutting or scratching 
• Causing bruises
• Banging their head against a wall
• Pulling out hair
• Burning 
• Falling over 
• Breaking an arm or leg

What self harm isn't : 

  •  Just attention seeking . Maybe it is a cry out for help or maybe it's a secret release, there are so many different reason but if its a cry out for help then they need attention for something and if that is the only way they feel it can be asked for them,  they definitely need help with something . So give them that help . 
  • Something that only happen's to people who are depressed or suffering from any other mental illness. Anyone of anyone age, gender, background or religion can be put in circumstances which may lead to them feeling the need to self harm . However I truly believe that every one of those people can (with a lot of hard work and help) overcome this and get better because I believe in you no matter how bad it's got and regardless of whether you still have any faith in yourself whatsoever. I still believe and will continue to believe in the wonderful person that is YOU . <3
  • Something that self harmer's enjoy or they wouldn't do it. No NO NO No NO NO! Just NO . I'm not even going to comment on this ridiculous myth . If you seriously think that someone enjoys hurting themselves ... I think you need to think that through again because you got confused somewhere . 

Okay so I promised distractions so distraction's you will get. Just to remind you this is NOT an alternative to professional help but just to get you through the hour or however long it takes <3 I love you . I've asked people in the Help and Support Boards of the hopeful forum for their in put and some of my friends whom have been affected. Additionally I've done a lot of  Research on as many reliable sites as I could and I will leave links to sites that can help or have useful pages at the end of this post  Also if you have any good distractions or beneficial idea's please feel free to help others as long as you are kind feel free to comment whatever you wish. 

Guy's please don't cut yourself...just remember each scar will remind you why you did it and that causes even more till you can't cut anymore...I love every single one of you guys!♥ and that's coming straight from my heart...I promise!

  • Call Someone. I can't say this enough times because it's so under rated but it's so so beneficial and important . " You Are Not in this Alone"  I have this written on my bedroom wall next to my bed for whenever I'm sad because as humans we tend to convince ourselves that we are alone when we're upset but you are not more alone than you were ten minutes before are you, really ? Call someone, anyone . You have people who love you and care about you . You don't even have to talk to them just call them and cry down the phone for a bit . Whether it's your family, your best friend or childline ( 0800 1111) you can call them . You are never alone . 
  • Punch a pillow . This is a good way of releasing tension if you are angry or worked up . Just make sure what you're hitting is soft so that you wont damage yourself . Hitting a rolled up newspaper on a door frame does a similar thing . 
  • Scream ! Seriously darlin, just get it all out of your system and if people are in the house try screaming into a pillow . 
I'd like this, just much smaller. The semi colon showing when a sentence could have ended but didn't, the butterfly being the symbol of alternatives to self-harm.
  • List the good the good things about yourself. Don't even tell me there isn't any because there are . It's not a bad thing to think about the good things in yourself . Nowadays girls seem to think it's not okay to actually say " Do you know what ? I'm me . I'm okay with that . I am beautiful " ergh society makes me so angry . I might do a blog post about that at some point. But seriously just look at the small things like well your eyes are a really nice shade for starters <3 

    • Have some "me" time. Go run yourself a bath and cuddle up in bed having a Inbetweener's marathon ( or anything you like , but something that might make you smile would be good ) . 
    • Paint your nails. This keeps your hands busy and that can be extremely useful . 
    • Knitting .. you should make a scarf for the winter I know you're still going to be here for <3 
    • Cross stitch , how about you make a cute little cross stitch for the friend who's always there ? Or even just for you because I guarantee you are worth it :)  
    •  Baking, being organised and weighing out the measurements and doing something productive is a good way to start to feel a little more in control .
    • Painting
    • Drawing
    • Playing an instrument, if you can sing or if you can't , go and sing your little heart out until the hurt has gone away . 
    • Writing, you could take all that emotion and turn it into a best selling novel ! Wow it's going to be amazing I can just see it now ;) <3 
    • Clean you're room or organise something . It can help if you feel out of control this can distract you, give you a sense of achievement when you're done as well as  please your carer ;) 
    • Play games ... go kill someone on GTA or Rock out on guitar hero, whatever  takes your fancy aha .
    • Squeezing an Ice cube 
    • Sucking on a Lemon ... For the shock factor . I don't know how well this would work but anything's worth a shot and I guess it makes sense aha ;) 
    • Give every person in all your magazines a moustache 
    • EXERCISE! Exercising is key to calming down and de-stressing and whilst it's de-stressing you you're releasing feel-good endorphins that but you on a natural high making you feel happy :) Now doesn't that sound like a nicer alternative ? <3 
    • Run you're hands under freezing cold water 
    • Counting ceiling lights or tiles to distract you and write them down as you count to keep your hands busy ... and if your hands still need to be busy after that make a graph to show lights in all the different rooms of the house :) Sounds boring but if your hands are busy then it's fantastic :) Just like you <3
    • Write out the lyrics to your favourite song <3 There's a line I like in Pierce The Veil's " Hold On Till May " that says : " If I were you I'd put that away, See you're just wasted thinking bout the past again. Darlin' you'll be okay . " They're right you're going to be okay. Maybe not right now but if you give up now then you're never going to know <3 It's difficult and I understand that but you need to hold out a lil bit longer honey . 
    • Learn to swear in another language because that's clearly a talent you need to have far more than that mark which you don't <3 Trust me . 
    • Memorise a poem with meaning .
    • Feel your pulse to remind yourself that you're alive and that's pretty damn awesome (( <3 ))
    • Make a notebook of your favourite quotes that help you ... PINTEREST TIME ! :D 
    • Make yourself a safe place whether its some beanbags with blankets in your room or you've added nine pillows and every cuddly toy you own to your bed just make it cosy and lovely and put a book or your laptop next to it whichever you like . Now go take a freezing cold shower ... I know I'm sorry if it's a bit chilly but try . Once your out the shower pop your nicest fresh PyJama's on and climb in to your cosy place and notice how warm and safe it feels in comparison then watch YouTube, Read all of the Harry Potter books or Catch up on every episode of The Great British Bake Of ( WOO ) whatever makes you feel all snugly inside and do it all night . Just have sometime for you to be calm ... and add a Milky way , that's what I give myself when I having some calm time ;) <3
    • Bake ! I'm sure it will be yummy :) Maybe you'll be in the next series of bake off.. wow that would be so cool, yeah you should definitely bake :) 
    • Listen to music ! This is the most common method , please comment songs that help you <3 
    • Get a Wreck This Journal ... and wreck it ;) 
    • Brose Amazon and Ebay .. Kit out your whole future house with your imaginary unlimited budget :) 
    • Write a letter to brighten someone else's day ... maybe even a stranger and you could just leave it in a cafe ? <3 

    "The semicolon is used when a sentence could have ended, but didn't"  -- The Semicolon Movement --  The movement is for anyone who has ever self-harmed, has a personality disorder, or has tried to commit suicide. The semicolon is a sign of hope. Your sentence is not over yet, remember that. | Check out this tumblr!
    These are just a few alternatives ! There are loads and you can do all of them . I Know you can . I want you to know that even if it feels unbearable .. it isn't  . You can hold out and get through this and there doesn't need to be a mark on yourself to show you felt like that . If you need help ( which you do if you feel the need to hurt yourself ) please, please ask for it . It's out there and available to you and yes it might be scary to ask but you need to honey and it's always better than suffering alone . You just need to stay strong because you are a fighter and don't you dare under estimate yourself because if you think that you can't do it , 1) You're going to trick yourself into believing that . and 2 ) If someone else told you that you we're too weak to do something would you listen to them or prove them wrong ? Self belief is important and you should believe in yourself .. because I believe in you and I don't just believe in anyone , You're special .  If you do mess up , try again . When you were a kid you didn't just magically stand up and be able to walk perfectly did you ? But when you fell down you got up and look at you now . A beautiful , wonderful strong example of a human being ... wow :o <3 You're amazing . 

    Here are a few useful websites I found for you <3 :) - On-line councillors , you don't even need to leave your room to get help just click the link, you can do that <3
    Childline - This link will take you to a list of Self Harm distractions on the childline website - Lots of information and facts 
    Harmless - Coping strategies
    Self Injury Support -  Some self help stuff :) 
    Mind - All kinds of support 

    If you know any helpful sites please leave the links in the comments <3 

    Stay Strong <3 Stay Smiley :) 

    Keep Going like the absolutely wonderful person you are <3 

    Much Love , Love Much-ly 

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